Shock
by TheShulesLovin'Psycho
Summary: When Juliet O'Hara gets shot while working a case, what will happen to Shawn and the others? DEATHFIC! (I read The Pearl right before I wrote this, so I'm sorry if my writing is all Steinbecky- I assure you I don't usually write like this!) This is my first fanfiction, so please give feedback! I don't own Psych! And no, I don't hate Jules, but death has always fascinated me.
1. Chapter 1

Juliet was in shock. Something was wrong; some piece of hidden information was trying to come to her brain. She felt oddly apart from the others around her; the noise they were making didn't quite seem to reach her ears. After a minute, her head slowly cleared as she looked down to see the blossoming red stain on her chest. She dimly registered Shawn lowering her to the ground, asking her if she was all right. She didn't move. She was aware of her partner shouting, either to call an ambulance or to catch the sick bastard that had shot her. Knowing him, probably the latter. Juliet looked up to see Shawn's concerned face hovering over her own. She tried to sit up, but Shawn placed a gentle hand on her chest, forcing her head back down onto his lap. She finally was able to hear Shawn again, was able to understand the words that were being said.

"Does it hurt?"

She wondered about that for a minute, the question echoing through her brain. "Does it hurt". She thought that it should, given the fact that she had just been pistol whipped in the head by her assailant's gun and, to top it all off, shot through the chest. And according to Shawn, after the shock of being shot wore off, the pain was all-consuming and intense. But something was holding back the pain. After a minute, she realized what it was. She could feel the pain clawing its way toward her soul, fighting to overcome the protective barriers of Shawn's love. Juliet knew that that was why it didn't hurt, because Shawn was keeping her safe, his soul guarding hers, shielding it from harm. She looked back up again, and as her blue eyes met the concerned hazel, she couldn't help but think that there was nothing to worry about. It didn't hurt. And as long as Shawn was with her, she would be fine. But her cop instincts told her something else. While her heart remained firm in the comforting knowledge that she would be okay, her logical mind knew that it was not so. And finally, as she felt her vision begin to blur, her heart start to beat irregularly, the very life drain out of her body, her heart and mind were once again of the same opinion. Closing her eyes, Juliet tried her very best to listen to her heart, because if she had learned anything through all of her years in the force, it was to listen to her instincts. So she did. Her heart told her to say goodbye; she would never have another chance. Because Juliet O'Hara didn't have much time left.

She propped herself up on one elbow, and, with the last bit of strength she had left, reached up to touch his tear-coated cheek. Through the blood splattered all over him, which she recognized as her blood, she saw the denial in his eyes, the refusal to let her slip away, and Juliet felt her heart break. "I love you," she whispered. She wanted those to be her last words. She felt her head fall back onto his lap. And the then the world around her that she had lived in for seven years, the greatest years of her life, faded away until all she could see was black.

* * *

It felt like an eternity. She wanted to go, go wherever the strange Force was taking her. But something held her back. Two forces were tugging at her, one telling her to go up, up into the sky, and the other holding her down, forcing her back to earth, back to Santa Barbara. Juliet couldn't see, she couldn't hear, she couldn't smell, taste, or touch. But she could feel. And in her heart, she knew that the only thing holding her back was Shawn. She knew the feeling, the Force holding her down, and once she recognized it, she wanted to stay with it forever. The Force was deceptively gentle, as if it didn't care about what happened to her, and only used just enough strength to hold her down. It adapted quickly to every tactic the Force pulling her upward tried to use. One minute its pull was weak, the next it had tightened around her so strongly that she thought her soul would break along with her heart, which had broken the moment she had left Shawn. On the outside, the Force seemed carefree, nonchalant; it seemed as if its outer force was a disguise, used to hide its true personality. Only when the upward Force used all its strength and it was a dire, tense moment did the Force pull her back down, almost overprotectively. And with her heart, Juliet was sure that the force holding her back was Shawn. He was the only one who would never have given in, never have admitted to her passing away, never would have accepted the fact that she was truly gone. But even as the thought entered her mind, she felt the pull slacken, the force weaken, and she knew that, after what felt like an eternity, Shawn had given in. A wave of grief and sadness washed over her as she knew that Shawn, her true love, had finally moved on. It was not only her grief that clouded over her heart, but Shawn's, Carlton's, Gus's, Henry's, everyone who she loved and cared about. And as Shawn finally let her free, let the other Force pull her and take her soul away from her true love, Juliet was suddenly flying.

Soaring, was a more accurate word to describe it. She didn't know how long it had been since she had died: maybe an hour, maybe a year. More likely ten years. All she knew was that she was flying away, leaving Santa Barbara behind, leaving her job on the force behind, leaving Shawn behind. She felt sad as she then realized that she was leaving the one place where she had felt truly at home. But even as she felt sad that she was leaving, she felt another emotion, too. The same feeling that she had had when she got home from the police station every day to find Shawn waiting up for her, a huge smile plastered on his face which caused her own mouth to involuntarily curl into a smile, no matter how stressful the day had been. The same feeling she had every time she, Carlton, Gus, and Shawn had successfully solved a case. The same feeling that she had had when she and Shawn had kissed on that bridge in Canada so long ago. It was a feeling of coming home.


	2. Chapter 2

Shawn jumped off his bike before it had stopped moving and sprinted to where he knew Juliet was. He arrived on the scene at the same time as Lassiter, who was running toward them as well. The scene that met his eyes made his heart twist painfully.

Juliet's wrists were tied behind her back, her mouth gagged and her eyes wide. A tall masked man dressed in black was forcing her forward, and she was struggling with all her force. He slammed the gun he was holding into her head and she fell limp. Shawn saw the pain flash across her face before it was replaced by a look of determination. Trying to find something, anything that could help her, she looked up, her eyes suddenly widening. She and the perpetrator both saw Shawn at the same time. And Shawn saw it all. He usually considered his eidetic memory a blessing, but now he couldn't hate it more. He would always remember the moment that appeared to him to happen in slow motion. Shawn's mouth opened in a soundless cry as he saw the man look up, panic at the sight of the cops flooding the scene, and look back down at Juliet.

"No!" cried Shawn melodramatically as the man raised his gun and pull the trigger in one swift motion. He saw the bullet speed toward her chest, mocking him, telling him that he was a failure. He wouldn't get there in time. He would never be able to save her. As Shawn ran to Juliet, he made eye contact with Lassiter and some kind of understanding passed between the two. The man had, after roughly pushing Juliet away, fled the scene, and with Lassiter pursuing him, Shawn was sure he wouldn't get far. Shawn untied the ropes from her hands and rubbed the warmth back into them. He was aware of the pool of blood forming at her feet, the laborious breaths she was taking, the glazed look in her eyes that told him that something was dreadfully wrong. He gently lowered her to the ground, placing her head in his lap. He was nervously rambling while he stroked the blonde hair from her forehead, and knew that she couldn't hear a word he was saying. Shawn heard Lassiter swearing and yelling, and he saw recognition flash in her eyes for a fraction of a second. He watched as she sluggishly tried to sit up, but gently pushed her back down as she struggled because he knew that any more exertion would cause her to lose blood twice as quickly. He could only hope that the paramedics would get there fast enough.

Time moved slowly, mocking the horror-struck Shawn, who knew that every second that ticked by meant less hope of Juliet living. And as they waited and no ambulance came, Shawn was aware of Juliet's grip on his hand weakening. He came to the conclusion at the same time as Juliet; he could see it in her eyes. Juliet was dying. And there was nothing he could do to stop it.

Shawn pulled her closer; after staunching the blood flow with his jacket, there was nothing he could do but wait. Heartbroken, he could only watch as the determination slowly faded from her eyes only to be replaced by despair and love. Tears flowed freely down his face; he didn't care what anyone thought of him as long as Juliet was okay. But she wasn't. He saw her resolve waver, then crumple as she reached up to touch his cheek. He saw the smallest of smiles forming on her face as she whispered the three words that snapped everything into perspective for him, and he understood. Understood what true anguish was, understood what death truly meant. This heartbreak was nothing compared to when his pet lizard had died, not even when he thought that Desperaux had died. Juliet closed her eyes one final time, and as he repeated the sentiment back to her, he could only hope that she heard him.

He sobbed as he realized that he would never be able to say it to her again, to hear her bright, melodic laugh whenever he made a joke, or be able to see her beautiful smile. He would never feel the warmth of her embrace again, or smell the intoxicating scent of her vanilla perfume mixed with the pineapple chapstick that she wore just for him. Shawn's fingers moved automatically, checking for a pulse, a heartbeat, any sign that she was still alive. But he knew that it was wishful thinking. As he cried, he felt Gus and Lassiter approach him, felt their hands gently rubbing his back, offering him comfort, offering him support. But he didn't need comfort. He didn't need support. He needed Juliet. But she was gone. He would never see the beautiful Juliet O'Hara, ever again.

* * *

Ten years later

Shawn approached her grave slowly, as he had every week since she died. He had never moved on, never fully healed from the loss. Since she had died, no one had been the same. Lassiter had almost gotten fired after snapping at every partner that the Chief had assigned him; after one particularly stressful day, he had reduced one to tears. Shawn didn't blame him. They deserved it, to think that they could take his Juliet's place. A tear slowly trickled down his cheek as the memories flooded back.

Gus had gotten married, had settled down with a beautiful wife and two children. Shawn had been happy for them, he really had, but at their wedding he couldn't help but feel jealous. Jealous that he wasn't the one up in front of everybody, with Juliet on his arm. Jealous that he could have had a future like them, with kids and a perfect life. Jealous that, instead of his best friend, he was the one with the love of his life ripped away from him, leaving him with a broken heart and an incomplete soul. Lassiter had gotten married as well, to Marlowe Viccellio, the girl of his dreams. The Chief's daughter Iris had grown to become the best teenage daughter anyone could ask for. Everyone had supported him, yes, and had grieved for Juliet, but everyone had gotten over it. Everyone but Shawn.

He glanced at the words on the gravestone, marking the ten-year anniversary since her death.

Juliet O'Hara

1976-2009

They were simple words, really. She was dead. Juliet O'Hara, the bright and always smiling detective, the only girl who Shawn had truly loved, the one who was always so happy and full of life, was dead. He pressed the single fake, plastic rose to his lips and then placed it on the cool stone. Closing his eyes, he took a deep breath and whispered, "Juliet, I will love you until this rose dies."

As he said the words, he felt something wash over him. Anguish, yes, but more than that. Acceptance. And assent. Certainly not approval, but consent. For the first time, he finally understood and accepted the fact that she was dead. He fell to his knees, crying uncontrollably, but he knew that she was gone. For ten years he had been trying to push it away, trying to persuade himself into thinking that she wasn't gone, trying to convince himself that, if he just thought about her long enough, she'd come back. But she hadn't. For the first time, he realized that his efforts to bring her back were futile, that he couldn't continue like this. He knew he loved her, and that she loved him, and that had to be enough. But was it? Sadness overwhelmed him as he sobbed, and as he murmured her name under his breath like a prayer, he heard a voice echoing in the back of his mind.

"Shawn," he heard. He gasped because he knew that that voice could only belong to one person.

"Jules," he whispered aloud. He could imagine her smile, the way her beautiful features lit up when he said her name.

"B-But you're dead! Wh-What's going on?"

"The ones who love us never truly leave us, Shawn. Didn't Gus and I tell you to read Harry Potter?"

"I did! Wait- how is this possible? I'm hallucinating, right? That must be it."

"You might be hallucinating, Shawn, or you might not. You can decide for yourself. Just remember, I might be dead, but I'll always be with you."

"How?" asked Shawn incredulously.

"In your heart, Shawn. I promise I'll never leave you. I love you."

With that, the echoing voice faded away. Shawn wiped the tears from his face and stood up, smiling slightly. He knew that he would never fully heal from her death, but that didn't mean that because she was gone, he should stop living. Because he still carried a part of her inside of him, in his heart. And because of that, he looked forward to the years to come, and would embrace the day when he would die and be reunited with his beloved Juliet.

EPILOGUE:

After leaving the graveyard, Shawn went back home, only stopping to check out the entire Harry Potter series from the library. The next day, Psych was called to the police station and Shawn solved the case in record time. When a man had been found dead at the scene, instead of somberly going about the case as he had for the last ten years, Shawn had immediately put the trademark finger to his head, causing everyone to stare at him in shock, and had joked around with Gus as usual. The entire SBPD had been surprised, but had accepted the change, and Shawn was, for the first time in ten years, somewhat happy. With a shock, he realized why. Ever since Juliet had died, he had not let himself live, hadn't let himself be… Well, himself. But now that he knew that Juliet would be with him, would laugh at every joke he made and would feel the pain and fear of every serial killer he would face, he felt strangely comforted. Every week he visited her grave, but instead of telling her about his week as he usually did, Shawn now felt that he didn't need to. Because Juliet would always be a part of him, would always endure what he had to endure and would take pleasure in the things he did.

It is said that, when Shawn died many years later, he had died with a smile on his face. Everyone had assumed that he would, mainly because their psychic was always happy, and it would just be out of character for him to have died frowning, or crying. No one suspected that it was because he was happy to die. Ecstatic, really. As Shawn had closed his eyes and given himself to death, he hadn't been able to keep a huge grin from forming on his face. Because when he opened his eyes again, he had seen a pair of beautiful, shining blue eyes and a tide of long blonde hair, and a bright and smiling Juliet had hugged him and welcomed him back home.


End file.
